Birdy Wordy

1 Peter 1 The Message (MSG) 1  1-2  I, Peter, am an apostle on assignment by Jesus, the Messiah, writing to exiles scattered to the four winds. Not one is missing, not one forgotten. God the Father has his eye on each of you , and has determined by the work of the Spirit to keep you obedient through the sacrifice of Jesus. May everything good from God be yours! A New Life 3-5  What a God we have! And how fortunate we are to have him, this Father of our Master Jesus! Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now! God is keeping careful watch over us and the future. The Day is coming when you’ll have it all—life healed and whole. 6-7   I know how great this makes you feel, even though you have to put up with every kind of aggravation in the meantime. Pure gold put in the fire comes out of it proved pure; genuine faith put through this suffering...

I've been lamenting about the space I'm in. This blessed me so much to read. Exodus 14:14 "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." Commentary: 14:10-14 There was no way open to Israel but upward, and thence their deliverance came. We may be in the way of duty, following God, and hastening toward heaven, yet may be troubled on every side. Some cried out unto the Lord; their fear led them to pray, and that was well. God brings us into straits, that he may bring us to our knees. Others cried out against Moses; fear set them murmuring as if God were not still able to work miracles. They quarrel with Moses for bringing them out of Egypt; and so were angry with God for the greatest kindness ever done them; thus gross are the absurdities of unbelief. Moses says, Fear ye not. It is always our duty and interest, when we cannot get out of troubles, yet to get above our fears; let them quicken our prayers and endeavors, but not silence our faith and hope....

This is my first post in a long time. I've been inspired to write about my childhood and decided it's time to start. I don't know where this is going but I beleive it's time to write the old me off. I've got to let it all out so I can let it all go and move on from it. My story isn't unlike many other's but it's proof that there is a God and He has been there through all the trials and triumphs. Pray with me about the direction I take.

My wonderful family comforted me tonight. They stood around me, holding me, crying with me, praying with me and for me. We praised. We worshipped. I let loose. I'm so grateful to God for lifting up a standard in my time of crisis. He knows what He is doing. I'm so grateful for the people He has placed nearby. He wrapped me in so many loving arms tonight. I will not forget to speak life over myself and my child. I will not allow shame to silence me. You will get the glory. I will continue to pursue you and with more zeal than ever before. Forgive me for doubting even in the least. You are bigger than I've made you. Thank you. Lord. I love you.

To My Dear Future Husband, You are someone who values me. I see you as someone who is particular for good reason. I see you as someone who says what he means and I feel like you are stable minded and consistent. You have no idea how I’ve prayed for someone with your characteristics to come in to my life. I am drawn to you and you to me. You’re intuitive. We're alike in that way. At times that makes me feel vulnerable because I want to be strong in your eyes but you ensure I'm not weak and you praise me for all the good. Even when I’m smiling on the outside you can read right through me. You know exactly when I need a special touch of comfort. You prove to me beyond surface level flattery that you’re near, that your love is intentional and reaches further than I imagine. You pray for me. We pray together. We worship together. We serve together. You know the perfect amount of space to give and take.  I feel like I’m looking in the mirror and I see you and we are p...

You know your creation very well. So intimately you reside. You send me love, light to share, joy to feel, comfort and healing, loving kindness as grace, understanding and mercy.  You’re the professor of my life; in You is all I need to know. Skillfully you formulate every detail of my being. Your hands are like no other. Masterfully you weave, skillfully and intelligently you devise every fabric of my life. Then who more should I trust? You are the most high power, being, spirit, life and truth. You are in everything, you have all the power and yet you give me room to move and grow. You have faith in me. Your sweet spirit blankets me and permeates all that surrounds me. I see you in everything and I can’t wait to see everything you have in store for me. I want more of you. My, God, why am I worthy of this? I adore you. Have all of me. by Anna M.P. 

Somewhere in between the desire to serve and getting things done, ministry has become a to-do list and filing system. Singing praises has become a rehearsal date and an all day obligation come Sunday. With good intentions in tow I've drifted from the heart of worship feeling further from God. My worship has become a predictable offering and not a surrender. Don't get me wrong, I am a worshiper by design and experience the presence of God (only by His grace) but I'm certain there's more of me He desires to get a hold of but it has to be by my submission not force. A check-list and full calendar of to-do's designated for "kingdom work" is no longer cutting it. I could be comfortable right where I am but there has to be more of me to give in spirit. There's more He's placed in me to redeem. Clearly in order to deepen my worship with my life I have to make choices to surrender my life for His purpose. That's a no-brainer at this point in m...

What I'm learning now. Having faith that God has my life in His hands. Discerning God's voice vs. My own. Waiting. There are specific areas of life I have to address before I can move forward. These are things that are long overdue. God must always be #1. Always pray for direction. Guard the heart. Specific relationship dont's. Finish.

I feel like I'm in a war zone on the platform where we minister. Some kind of spiritual bully is out to get me. Perhaps it's the inner me and not the enemy. Could be both! All I want to do is edify God and encourage His people. Why is it every single time I get up to sing at church I mess it up bad? When I was out in the world singing about rolling trees and some: I'd rather die young mess, I was fine. Had the occasional blip here and there but that was due to having too much to drink before singing. So what's my deal? Am I intimidated? Have I not learned how to move out of the way? I'm not the boastful type but my voice is above average so there's really no excuse. It's a good thing I do well with humility or I would never go back to church just to save face! This is ridiculous. I am ridiculous. From the sounds of the aftermath the song I ministered a long with the Ensemble really blessed folks. Sounds like the atmosphere was set up real nice with al...

Guess I better start with not comparing myself to what others are doing for God. Instead start an inventory on the gifts God gave me and ask myself if I'm using them for His purpose and at the capacity He desires.. Singing I sing in 2 choirs at church and am on the Worship & Praise team. I post singing videos to YouTube about my faith. Administration I am the choir assistant for my church choir. I assist the Minister of Music with administrative duties. Technical & Arts I offer my artistic and technical skills to about 8 different groups at church for their ministry needs. I am one of the web masters for my church. Writing I rewrite popular secular songs in to songs about Christ and share them with my YouTube audience. I keep a few Blogs: My experience and growth in Faith, My Weight loss journey and Bible Study lessons. Encouragement In conversation, in videos, in blogs, and in singing I share this gift. I am a walking wel...

Beyonce's song, I Was Here, reminds me of two things; the age long question of mankind's purpose and of Scripture. PLAY THE SONG WHILE YOU READ! Scripture: Matthew 5:14-15    14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. The Song: The lyrics seem like a sort of meditation on purpose. It's like a self-convincing statement. I almost feel like she's saying these are my good deeds. Look and see, this is why I am a good person. I get a loose feeling that she believes in something bigger than her. Although she doesn't live her entire life in front of me, and this is only something I can speculate, it does not appear she is living her life for God through the spirit. The song almost seems like self reassurance. I don't write this to hate on her. Not at all. I actually pray she w...

The cinder block was reliable. Every day it sat. Hottest time of the year came, there it was. Filled it with mud most the time. You know, it never talked back. I liked that. Never felt like something was missing when I was there. Hours passed. Dried out mud cakes, the low buzz of airplanes passing by, and the inflections of a nearby lawnmower running. Buuuuh. Reer. Bzzzz. Buuuh. Them lawn mowers still make me feel a certain way. Like somewhere round the corner someone's living a normal life. A mom, a dad, a son and daughter. Ooh, don't forget the dog. Dad's got the lawn. Someone cares about the lawn? There my imagination would just go. They must have two freezers stuffed full. Man, there were times I wish I was full. The bubble guts. I remember the bubble guts. I'd pretend to serve dinner. Always been hospitable. Always been a dreamer. Mind could dance for days. Sometimes the feet would too. Most the time when I was spinning like Wonder Woman because I was her. Co...

Last December God spoke to me. "Get ready to serve, Anna." My first reaction was and still is a classic reaction we have to our call to serve; "Lord, I am not worthy." "I don't have it." "I don't know enough about you, Lord." "I am afraid." "What if I fail?" So much time being spent in a tug of war between His will and my own knowing that one day He may let go of the rope leaving me to fall and left with a decision to make. Do I grab a hold of the lifeline or do I forfeit? Two prophets have spoke to me about the ministry inside of me. The first said "You have a powerful ministry inside of you and you don't even know it." My response was "I'm beginning to know." I was trying to convince myself at that point. The second prophet said "God says to not worry, He will make everything perfect concerning you, Everything you have prayed for, everything you haven't as well. Stop hiding in the...

So what does the Bible say about sexual immorality? 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 ( NIV ) it says: "18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. How powerful and clear it is. All other sins a person commits are outside the body but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body ! One thing that comes to mind is that drugs are put in to the body so how is sex different when it too is introduced to the body? I'll have to ask one of the Deacons at my church. Anyway, so whose fault is it really if a child is introduced to sex at an early age due to another person's sin? What if it's generational? Sin is deep and I believe it can set off a cascading effect reaching further th...

I used to pray the same prayer every time I prayed and it was only once in a while. Imagine the redundancy and the thought God had about His daughter knowing every time she came to Him it was the same thing time after time. What if every conversation you had with a person was exactly the same verbatim every single time? Wow. That would irritate me quite honestly! Praise God He is much more understanding and long-sufferring . Come to think about it, the "small talk" we do with co-workers passing by in the hallway pretty much is an example of redundant, non-sincere exchanges. It's more of a formality. I've since been learning the power of prayer. I've learned the power of prayer for others as well. Prayer is a conversation with the Living God. He will begin to speak to your spirit! Sometimes when I pray I don't bring requests and not because I am ashamed to ask for things or I don't believe He could answer my requests but sometimes I just want to get on my ...

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 19 "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own. 20 You were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." I've struggled with my weight my entire life. Top weight ever was 340lbs. I was busting out of an XXXL . Alcohol, depression, pregnancy, bad nutrition and no exercise is what got me to that mass number and size. A typical meal consisted of 10 sausage links, 8 cups of rice smothered in cream sauce, and a big ole' soda. I used to eat two whole rows of Oreos in one sitting with 3 glasses of milk. Multiply this three times and that's pretty much how I was feeding myself every day. Fitting in to cars, public transportation, and society was an everyday struggle for me. The cruelty I experienced was enough to make anyone depressed. Let's not even talk about how it hindered my relationships because of my low self-esteem! The only ...

Orderliness is by far the theme today. Everything I was involved in had something to do with communication, process, planning, execution, in ORDER to do this or that. Not in the every day way either! I'm so thankful for God's spirit. I could've easily gotten frustrated and discouraged. Instead confirmation after confirmation that it's time for ORDER excited me! Change and confrontation can be delicate but it's time. God's got me in a space to develop my sense for process, honesty, truth, and desire for fairness, for self-awareness and improvement and the need for clear communication to do great things. We blame. We make excuses. We take no responsibilty. We sit in a mess waiting for someone else to get it in order. We aren't proactive. We need to be told what to do. We are idle. It's like watching an accident and no one runs to help. No one calls 9-1-1 assuming someone else will. Or everyone runs to help crashing in to one another making a big mess and b...

Coming from the Book of Psalms Today! Psalm 66:19 But certainly God has heard me; He has given heed to the voice of my prayer. Angels Standing By My co-worker is reading an intercessory prayer book and told me about this story: A teacher and her husband live in a district that is rich in crime and adversity. The concerned teacher decided before the school year began to pray over every students desk and chair. She prayed that an angel would sit with every child and protect them. The school year started and the teacher had the children on assignment to write down what they wanted to be when they grew up. One child leaned over to the other and read his paper. It said "I want to be a mighty man of God." The other child asked aloud what that meant and it caught the teacher's ear. The teacher walked over in curiosity and listened as the child told the inquisitive classmate what a mighty man of God was. The teacher was elated and touched. A little bit later the child w...

Coming from Exodus 20:21 today! Exodus 20:21 "Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee ." My mother is hilarious! Where to begin? Let me tell you about her altar. It's adorned with Catholic style goodies. There's the crucifix, saints, blessed oil, food offering, the Lord is my Shephard rug, a picture of Jesus wearing the crown of thorns, a rosary and a wall of inspirational and religious pamphlets. Walking in to her room where this altar lives is like woh ! What Filipino home is complete without one? She has a bible the size of a suitcase on her coffee table too! She is equipped for some serious get down on the Jesus tip. Mother Tid -bits... The Tagalog language doesn't use he and she so she is always calling me a he and her grandsons she. It's confusing! Oh and when she tells stories with numbers in it she always holds up the wrong number of fingers! Mom was telling me stories about my sibl...

If you could do something all over again knowing what you know now, what would it be? You know you've played this game! Some of us say we'd change nothing and others have a laundry list of should-coulda-wouldas! Oowee. You ever see that movie Sliding Doors? Gwenyth Paltrow's character plays a woman who boards a train. Simple and almost boring, right? Not. The movie goes in to how her life would be different if she would've missed the train. Throughout the movie you see her living both lives. It's fascinating! Why is it so fascinating to imagine how we'd be different today if we made a different choice? God gave me a big eraser and is allowing me to have fun with it! He's fighting back for me the years I lost... Example of years I've gotten back: 16.5 the number of years my son has been alive - the son I birthed at 17 came to God with His life and has accelerated in his purpose. I always worried how I would make it and what my children would do bec...